I'm always thinking I wish we were unschoolers, we should be unschoolers, yeah let's do it... then I tell the kids okay but you need to do this, this, and this first. Needless to say, we're not unschoolers. However, I am starting to like the idea of planning from behind. I keep a weekly tracker of what we actually do. There is no curriculum saying what we should get done and no stressing out over sticking to (or not sticking to) a plan. It can get tiring writing everything down and it is not possible to document all of our learning. For example, what is between the lines? The tracker doesn't document thinking time, conversations in the car or while I brush hair, free time when I'm not around. What is it they do in their rooms all day? It sounds cliché, but we are truly always learning. Despite its flaws, I do like the tracker. It emphasizes living now, learning what we want and need to know now.
By living now I do not mean we don't have long term goals. The kids still have goals and work towards them. The difference is they are not the school's goals, not my goals, they are their goals. Our childhood years are irreplaceable and when we should be most free. Spend them well. Not in school. Uggh! How awful. We can never retrieve lost time. Our childhood (our entire lives) should be experience based with an abundance of blank space to figure out and pursue our passions. No worksheets, gossip, sitting at a desk. I see you thinking... oh but all of my childhood memories were from school and they're not going to have that. That's all you have! They will have so much more! Their memories will be varied and adventurous, will ignite all of the senses, rooted in time and place. Not I remember that time in class when we got to wear pajamas and read books all day, getting our two books from the library was the best, or field day was so fun (my memories). That was fun but only because the experience was relative to all of my other school experiences (which were boring as hell when I wasn't getting into trouble). Reading in our pajamas, going to the library, and having field day is literally our life (when we want it to be).
Always preparing for a distant future that one is not passionate about is similar to saving money for the sake of saving money. There is no focus on the present. I asked my husband about going camping and he didn't seem to want us to go. He said we are always spending money anyhow. Come on! Let's live now. Sure you should save a little, but don't overdo it. Marriage equals compromise I guess. Uggh! After this conversation, I got to thinking about how a lot of people put themselves in the situation where they have to go go go nonstop because of choices they knowingly made. They bought that truck. They bought that house. Stop working just so you can buy shit (or more likely pay off credit cards). Live a little. So, no!!! Don't spend money on new cars or houses or clothes. Buy material things you need used when possible and spend on experiences (and I don't mean eating experiences). When you buy that car and set up that payment plan you are giving away your freedom. Don't tie yourself down. Set yourself free! What irks me the most are people who complain they have no money when they are clearly paying for a lot. We all have our priorities I guess. For me, a camping trip is never a waste of money. Spending money on camping reservations is not spending "anyhow." It is purposeful. The experience is the goal.
Even though having goals and constantly working towards them is essential, we have to live our dream now as we prepare for our dream...if that makes sense. So if my goal/dream is to backpack Canada and Alaska, then yes, I need to save some money. I'm not going to stop going on outdoor adventures in the meantime. They just might be a little closer to home. Also, my kids and I do not have the same goals. Their goals are expensive! It is all a balancing act. The kids are forever asking us to buy them things (usually food) and we pretty much always say no. Why? Because it does not align with our goals as a family. If we spend money on eating out then that is taking money away from dance, baseball, Taekwondo, etc.. Which would you rather have? If it is truly their passion, the passion wins.
Next post...what are our goals, how do we work towards them, and how do I balance competing goals (there are seven of us).
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Our weekly tracker.
From below.
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